JOB HUNT: Good but NOT good enough...

When I first read this on tumblr, I reworded it:

If something is not happening for you, it doesn't mean it's never going to happen...it means they're not ready for YOU!

 I twisted it to make it more optimistic for me, but thinking it over, maybe I am the one who isn't ready...

After yet another rejection, I realized that this statement is true as is.  

With all these rejections, one thing has stayed constant.  All of them said that I have a good resume and good experience, BUT...

The exception is my lack of enthusiasm, my lack of experience, my lack of interest in that particular industry in public relations.  My problem is that I want to try out different areas of public relations to see what I like and what I don't like.  I guess being well-rounded isn't a good thing in this case.

I need to focus, but with so many interests (having yet to discover others), it's been difficult to figure out where I want to go in public relations.  So far I have experience in a non-profit organization that focused on community programming through its park system and experience in a boutique food and hospitality agency.  I loved working in both, but I want to be exposed to, learn more about, gain experience in:

• Corporate communications
• Fashion/beauty
• Entertainment
• Travel
• Digital/Social Media
• Technology (consumer-based)
• Museums

While I want to be part of a bigger global picture, I need to start off somewhere. I enjoy making people happy, which is key in public relations right? Making your clients/patrons/media partners/community members happy?  I like being behind the scenes, making things happen, getting stuff done and reaping the rewards afterward - mostly just the sense of accomplishment will do. 

So how do I go about trying to figure out what path to go on in public relations? Apparently the experience route is out of the question. Textbooks? Blogs? Websites? I have no problem with research, so let's go!  I'll record my thoughts on yet another blog that will solely focus on public relations material: http://tmmpr.wordpress.com (it's still under construction). Hopefully this method will help clear this vague picture I have of public relations and all its different facets and take me down a path worthwhile.

With this new game plan, I still ponder this question (referring back to the quote)...

It may be true that I'm not ready for it, 

but how will I be ready without a chance?

Unemployed...and hating it.

Eleven months ago, I embarked on my New York adventures.

Eleven months later, I'm back where I started - home.

It hasn't even been a month since I moved back home, but I'm starting to have feelings of regret.

I mean don't get me wrong.  It's great being home with my family, eating home-cooked meals, basking in the Californian sun and more.  I love getting the chance to see my cousins too.  It has been stress relieving to just relax for a bit.

However, as relaxing as it is to be home, unemployment has been getting to me...

When I left New York, I left three jobs, working for Macy's, the Disney Store and City Parks Foundation at SummerStage, so not keeping busy with work has been an extreme change of pace.  I suppose I need the break though.

When I found out on-calls get to come back to work on Monday, I feel like I'm missing out on work, even though it's across the country.  It makes me want to go back to New York, even though it's just a part-time job.  At least I would be working, while looking for work in public relations.

Did I give up too easily on the New York dream? I feel like I did.  I analyzed my situation and came to the conclusion of going home.  On the other hand, I knew my opportunities for a career would decrease immensely by moving home, but I took that risk anyway.  Now I'm back where I started - unemployed...and hating it.

I've been trying my best to get a job though.  I submitted applications to a variety of places but only heard back and interviewed with a few.  I still have hope for the places I interviewed with, but my patience is testing me.

I keep telling myself to stay optimistic...!
But it's hard with this heavy feeling of regret...

Plus it doesn't help with the financial crisis going on in this country.

P365: LaGuardia Airport [043]

Flying out of LaGuardia brought my NYC adventure full circle. When I first came to New York on that one-way ticket in September 2010, I arrived in LaGuardia. Now, it’s come to an end, and I’m leaving from the same airport.

This is sunrise while I was on the plane. The last sunrise I saw in New York…

Taken on Sony Cybershot.

P365: Top of the Rock [042]

On my final day in New York City, I went to the Top of the Rock observatory to see an amazing 360-degree view of city.  It was the perfect way to end this 10-month NYC adventure!  While I was gazing out and enjoying the view, I saw all the different places I went to while I was here, and a rush of memories came to me.  Then I got all teary-eyed thinking of all the people I met and how much I would miss them.  Another reality check that I was leaving New York…

P365: Lincoln Center [037]

After running into and spending time with friends from Macy’s, I was hit with the realization of leaving New York City.  Sitting on the steps of the beautiful Lincoln Center, my eyes were filled tears, but then after some comforting, it also became apparent that I should think positively by remembering the wonderful memories with good friends.  :)

Dear NYC: Thank you for the adventure!

Chrysler Building

Today marks my 10th month in New York City.  Can you believe I've been here that long?!  So close to making it one year.  However, that won't happen this year...

Today also marks the beginning of my last week in New York City.  I will be moving back home on July 13.

As some of you may know, I've been struggling to figure out which coast to live on.  In fact, this struggle initiated way back in October.  I fought to stay here, but after much deliberation, I've concluded that it would be best to move home for the time being.

As much as I have enjoyed living in New York City, I've noticed that my heart is still on the West Coast with my family and friends.  After visiting home at the end of May, it became even more apparent that I should move back to California.  I missed being with my family, but I feel like it's mostly because I was so tired of feeling so lonely in NYC.

That's right. I felt loneliness in a city with over 8 million people, but even though I was constantly surrounded by people, I was often exploring the city by myself (probably my fault for not reaching out to the friends I've made here).

Anyway, when I was at the airport, I cried before boarding the plane to NYC.  The tears just flowed out of my eyes as I thought about my family that I was leaving again.  I had no idea when I would be returning home at that time or what the future held for me, especially since I was not getting any leads for jobs.  Little did I know that I would be booking a ticket back less than a month after returning.

My 10-month adventure in New York City as been filled with amazing experiences and wonderful relationships that I will never forget.  I'm going to highlight some of those in a couple posts, which will be part of a segment called, "Dear NYC."

I did not expect to be here for nearly a year.  Remembering back to when I first came here in September, I only came to NYC to help my Lola (grandma) travel across the country to see new granddaughter.  At that time, I only planned to stay for 4 to 6 weeks, considering the amount of clothes I packed.  But with a job and internship, I was prompted to stay much longer than anticipated.

Throughout my time here, one question kept coming up - "How long will you be here?" I always had the same answer - "I don't know," which was usually followed by an excuse of why I needed to stay (job/internship).  But even though I had some legit reasons for staying, do you know how hard it was to live with such uncertainty?  I was basically taking it one day at a time, hoping for new opportunities.

Ah! But that's all over now!  I feel so relieved that I finally decided where to go.  I already feel 100 times happier, knowing that I will be home during the summer.  Although I may not know how long I'm staying there, I'm glad I don't have to worry about all the expenses I had to worry about in New York.  Although I'm happy for going home, I'm also sad to say farewell to everyone I met here.  It's a bittersweet moment.

Peace out, NYC! 

I hope to return to New York City, but this time it will be on my own terms.  It won't be a spontaneous trip as a travel companion.  It will be well-thought out and planned in advanced.  Time constraints and living situations will be determined.  Career paths will be paved.  It will be a more enriching experience to enjoy the city and time spent with friends, rather than working all the time (because you know how I'm a workaholic).  My next time in the Big Apple, whether it's just a visit or a move back, I will do it my way.

Thank you for the memories, New York! It's been a blast...!

P.S. Look out for the next "Dear NYC" post...

Reality Check...

Being in Portland but away from all the 

UP Orientation activities was a reality check.  

I know I graduated 5 months ago, and I thought it hit me back then when I conducted my last CPB meeting.  The bittersweet feeling of graduating lingered throughout senior year, especially as the weeks got closer to that final day.

However, today, it hit me that I'm no longer a student at the University of Portland.  I LOVE the University of Portland and all my friends who are still there.  It's just weird not being on campus with them now, helping out with Orientation and welcoming the new freshmen like I have done for the past three years.

I'm thankful that I was able to see so many familiar faces while I spent time here in Portland, but I wish I was able to spend more time with them like we did before, whether it was around campus, in the library or in the basement during those crazy late nights. I won't ever forget the memories I made at the University, but I hope to continue to make new memories with the friends I made there.  I know it'll be difficult to plan out when and where we'll next meet, but I'm positive that it will happen!

Good luck this year Pilots! It'll be another great year on the Bluff! :)